A Time For Reflection

Sitting here tonight thinking about the beginning of a new year. I'll just admit...I am scared. I have looked back over the last year and my thought was what have I really accomplished..... Hmmm...let me think.....There has been progress with hubby and I in the area of finances....A good thing. I am a stepmom and I have seen ups and downs there, but more ups. In the area of marriage, there have been ups and downs there as well...times when I wasn't sure what was going to happen, but because of Love we overcame. I am learning that in marriage there should always be growth, if not you are in trouble. I have learned something I should have learned a long time ago that Trust In God Is Key To Everythng. When you put your trust in people, they let you down....When you put your trust in money it disappears. A job... well you can lose it. God's love never fades, fails or lets you down. When I have felt at my lowest and I've prayed, I have sensed God's prescence. I am beginning to believe that "fear" has been my biggest enemy...all of my life but specifically this year. This one thing I know that your dreams and visions have to be bigger than the fear that holds you back. I am determined as the song says "to hold out to the end". That same song goes on to say "Jesus is with me on Him I can depend...I know I have salvation for I feel it in my soul....I am determined to hold out to the end!" That determination...with God's help will carry me through. My wish for this year is to become a healthier individual...physically, mentally and spiritually....let go of the fear and hold on to the FAITH.

Hmmm... perhaps last year wasn't so bad! Well, If things were actually accomplished last year.....I am determined this year will be even better. Time to get up and get going!

When You Are All Wrung Out

Isn’t it easy to neglect ourselves to meet the needs of everyone around us, and call it self-sacrifice? It sounds godly. But in doing so we risk shutting down a place in our soul where God’s dreams and gifts are waiting to be revealed. The truth is: you and I were not designed to be whom others expect us to be, or even want us to be. We were created to become all that God planned for us to be."
Renee Swope


Well good day my friends....This blog comes from an article I read recently. The title is "Look Out For Overload, Know Your Capacity".  It was written by Jane Rubietta. I like this lady....I could be friends with her. She starts out her article talking about this awful screeching noise she hears coming from her basement. She says she ran down the stairs and all she could smell was the scent of burnt rubber and smoke filling the air. It was the washing machine. She opens the lid of the machine and says she found at least 25 pounds of teenage jeans, sheets, and towels. Apparently the machine had been overloaded one to many times and it had worn out the bearings and the belt had slipped off. Ouch! She says her children had broken all the rules. She also says and I agree that she loves the idea of the manufacturer setting practical and knowable limits to the appliance and we should know how many items our machine can handle and stay within that limit. Jane says too that she had thought of setting a scale next to the washing machine.

Now Ms. Jane goes on in the article to compare the washing machine to our bodies and minds. This is where it hit home to me. We as christian women do not know sometimes how to use the word No. If someone ask us to do something we feel obligated to say yes, no matter how we may be may feeling physically or mentally. Now what compels us to do this? Why aren't we Christians? Isn't that the christian thing to do? In the article Jane talks about the "load limits" that the creator of the universe puts on our minds and bodies. We were created to do only so much and Father God knows exactly what we can handle. When we exceed our "load limits" our bodies and minds can break down. When this happens we, on the light end, can and do become grumpy, irritable and just plain mean. Now if this behavior continues, our bodies and minds begin to break down and fall apart. Depression, heart attacks, strokes can happen.

Now let's talk about how to keep this breakdown from happening to our "wonderful machine". Our maker, creator God created each one of us to be unique. Not one of us is created exactly like the other. My neighbor Ms. Martha may be able to wake up in the morning get the husband and children off to work and school, clean the whole house, go out and work in the garden, come in and can tomatoes and then prepare for everyone to come home. She then greets the children and husband at the door, gets the children started on homework, answers phone calls from her group leader at church, prepares dinner and finishes her day by greeting her husband in the boudoir showered and smelling sweet. I know ladies like this. Oh my gosh...I want to say. I am not Martha. If I were to try and do what she does, I would break down. My creator did not make my machine to handle the same load amount. Well how do we know what we should and should not be doing? That my friend is where prayer and meditation on God's word comes in. The Creator did give us a owner's manual and yes the Bible would be said manual. When I read the owner's manual and pray to my Maker and ask him to guide me, he is faithful and will do so.

My friends I want to encourage you to find time to get alone with your creator and talk to him...he is listening and will speak to you if you will listen. He knows you better than you know yourself.  The noises and voices of this world will try and tell you how and what you should do. Be careful about giving in to those things. They can and will wear your body and mind out.

The following are some scriptures that you might study and meditate on.....

Eph. 5:15-17 Therefore be careful how you walk, not as unwise men but as wise, 16making the most of your time, because the days are evil. 17So then do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is.

Col. 1:9  So we have not stopped praying for you since we first heard about you. We ask God to give you complete knowledge of his will and to give you spiritual wisdom and understanding.

Romans 12:2 Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is--his good, pleasing and perfect will.

Letting It Go! (What I Chose To Do With This Anger)

OK what is on my mind today....I think that it is probably what is on the mind of pretty much the rest of the nation, The case of Casey Anthony. I believe it will be one of those cases that years from now when someone ask you, you could probably remember your exact location when you heard the verdict. I can tell you that when the verdict (not guilty) was announced yesterday (July 6th, 2011), it made my blood boil. According to my facebook friends, their blood was boiling as well.

Now let's address the anger that everyone is feeling. I can only speak for myself, but my anger came from feeling that there was no justice done for this beautiful two year old little girl that died. Here a mother, young but still a mother's little girl is missing for approximately thirty days. There is no report to the police of the child missing and this young mother is out partying her tail off. Hmmm something doesn't seem right about that. To add insult to injury, when ask where there child is by her mom, dad, police....she continually lies. Now based on all of this information, one might be led to believe that this young mom had something to do with this child's disappearance and then when the body was finally discovered....her death as well. I listened to the news like everyone else, and so much of what was reported seemed to all point to Casey causing this death. So now one can see why I like everyone else was so angry when the verdict in this case against Casey Anthony came back "not guilty". She was found not guilty on all counts except four of which were lying to the police.

My first reaction was what were the people (the jurors) thinking. I thought what idiots. After I have had a day to listen to somethings that have been brought out now that the trial is over, I can see why the jurors did what they did. I am still not happy about the outcome, but I can let the jury off the hook. They had little physical evidence to work with. The prosecutors did not bring much to the table, but circumstantial evidence. They (the jury) were told that if they came back with a guilty verdict (the death penalty) that it had to be beyond a reasonable doubt. The defense team seemed to tear the prosecutions presentation apart. The defense was right, there was no physical evidence linking Casey Anthony to the crime. Without said evidence the prosecution did not have much of a case. They could prove that Casey was a habitual liar, a bad mother and just did not seem to care what had happened to her daughter. Given all of these things I can now see why the jury came back with the verdict they did.

Now what do I do with this anger I am feeling. As a christian, I began to pray. My prayer was "Father God help me let this anger go. I give it to you. You are the great vindicator and you will take care of it all." I know that this little girl is in heaven where there is no pain, no sorrow and no family drama and that is why I choose to let it rest at the feet of my heavenly Father. I, as well as the rest of the nation will never forget this beautiful little girl, Kaylie Marie Anthony, but I can just imagine her running through a field of daisies and chasing butterflies in heaven.

Thank you Father God for taking care of all things!!!!

Stop Stuffing Your Stuff!

This blog comes from a new time in my life. I have been given a wake up call from my doctor. I just found out that my thyroid levels are off, thus causing all kinds of problems with my body. Fortunately the doctors can give meds for this to bring my thyroid back into shape.  I am having pain in the location of my gall bladder. I had an ultrasound done on it and they found no gallstones, but are referring me to a  G I doctor...Gastrointestinal doctor. They now want  to look further into the gall bladder to see if there may be bile in this organ or anything else. In order to do this, they may be doing a nuclear test. Shoot by the time they get through with me I may glow in the dark. Perhaps a possible way to make money to pay for my portion of the bill. Then there is dental work that has to be done and my gyno has found a cyst on my ovary and I have cervical issues. I tell people that the warranty on my body has expired and I now am falling apart.

Now let's explore what I believe has contributed, if not completely caused these medical issues. That would be STRESS. One might ask "Do you mean stress can cause all of these problems?" You bet your booty it can. I was reading an online article about stress, let me share a bit of it with you.


Effects of chronic stress

The body doesn’t distinguish between physical and psychological threats. When you’re stressed over a busy schedule, an argument with a friend, a traffic jam, or a mountain of bills, your body reacts just as strongly as if you were facing a life-or-death situation. If you have a lot of responsibilities and worries, your emergency stress response may be “on” most of the time. The more your body’s stress system is activated, the easier it is to trip and the harder it is to shut off.

Long-term exposure to stress can lead to serious health problems. Chronic stress disrupts nearly every system in your body. It can raise blood pressure, suppress the immune system, increase the risk of heart attack and stroke, contribute to infertility, and speed up the aging process. Long-term stress can even rewire the brain, leaving you more vulnerable to anxiety and depression.

Many health problems are caused or exacerbated by stress, including:

Pain of any kind

Heart disease


Digestive problems


Sleep problems


Depression


Obesity


Autoimmune diseases


Skin conditions, such as eczema

Borrowed from Helpguide.org


Now let me share what I believe, in my case, was the cause of most of my stress and the reason for the title of this blog. It is what I like to call  "STUFFING".  I do not mean the food type, although enough of that can cause problems of its own. My idea of stuffing is when I have faced problems, specifically those of a human kind and instead of confronting the situation with the human...I would pretend it wasn't that bad, blow it off and go on.....In other words stuffing down the problem . This went on for years...I ended up divorced after sixteen years of marriage, having a nervous breakdown thus causing me to act and behave in ways I never believed I would. I became a very angry nervous person. I did not like myself.  Now I find my body falling apart.

I am sharing these things with you in hopes after reading this, if you have not done so already,  you will take control of your life. You do not have to be afraid of confrontation. Confronting someone or something can be done in love and can be the most liberating and freeing thing to happen to you. I choose to ask Creator God for guidance everyday. I have asked him to bring the right people into my path that would began to speak life to me....to encourage me, and he has not failed me there. I continue to look forward to  becoming healthy mentally, physically and spiritually. One of my favorite scriptures is "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength!" Oh yes I can! 

My friend do not stuff your problems, push your problems aside and pretend they do not exist. Only trouble can come from this. I encourage you to run to Father God and ask him for guidance. He is a faithful friend and will begin to open your eyes and show you the areas of your life that need to be addressed. I can not promise you that it will not be painful, but I can tell you that if you will listen, God will get you through these things and this time in your life. You will come out better on the other side.

Are You in Need of a Vindicator?

I was sitting in my church service today and found lots of tears flowing down my face. I have had a hard time not crying all day. I am sure anyone reading this is thinking, 'What would your pastor say to cause all the tears?' The content of his message came from Psalm 55.... In this passage David has been betrayed by his best friend and he finds himself crying out to God for vindication. In the last part of this passage he tells us this "Cast your burden on the Lord, and he will sustain you; he will never permit the righteous to be moved". At the very end of chapter, David tells God this...."But I will trust in you."

There are times in our lives when we experiance betrayal at the hand of a good friend, or worse yet family. I know first hand that when this happens it feels like someone has knocked the wind out of you and that is being nice. Our pastor talked about himself and a close family member and said that the person that turned their back on him, passed on and there was never reconciliation. It hurt him so badly. He said and I am not quoting...that this ate at him. He felt that in being a Christian he was supposed to love and honor and in this case he could try and love the person, but to honor them he would have to turn his back on some of his core beliefs and he could not do that. He says he had a hard time doing his job and sometimes a hard time sleeping. What was the final outcome? He cried out to God like David. He told us that he did not know how to explain it, but it was as if God reached down a hand and took this burden from him. God was and is his and our vindicator.

Now it is my turn to look to the heavens and cry out to God..... "Lord be my vindicator!" When I read this passage of scripture and heard the pastor, I know there is hope. I may never get the vindication I feel I deserve, but I know that my God is my lean to and my provider. You may want to know what happened to me, but it happened in the PAST and I am not out to do what I feel has been done to me. I want you my reader to know there is hope in Creator, Father God.  I will say like David, "God I will trust in you"!

Everyone has a story

I began reading a book by Kathie Lee Gifford about three weeks ago and I just finished it. I love it. Anyone that has looked at my facebook page could probebly tell that. I have posted two notes that consist of pieces from this book. It has truely touched my life. She is very open about her life and things she has been through and sometimes uses humor to share her stories.

One of the things that she shares in her book is about a series that she does on the Today Show called "Everyone Has a Story". In this series she and a man by the name of David Friedman write a song together. Well these songs are no ordinary songs, they are written for everyday ordinary people that have usually been through some type of tradgedy in their lives. Everytime I watch this series I cry. Here are the words to one of the songs....


EVERYONE HAS A STORY

Everyone has a story
Differant as night and day
And everyone has their own journey
Some follow their path, some wander away

But everyone has a moment
That changes their life, and then
It's suddenly clear in that moment
That nothing will ever be the same again

Careful the plans we make
Careful the roads we take
Careful the hearts we break
Along the way

Careful the things embraced
Careful the time we waste
Careful the dreams we taste
And toss away

Everyone has a purpose
Differant as day and night
And everyone finds their own answer
Some blinded by fear, some guided by light

Yes, everyone has a story
A beginning, a middle, and end
But if there's a God in the heavens above
And if there's such a thing as a thing called love
Then there must be a way for anyone's heart to mend

Careful the chance we take
Careful the choice we make
Careful, for heaven's sake
The road we take.....
Everyone has a story



My prayer.... Heavenly Father, when I am tempted to look at others and pass judgement, please help me remember "Everyone Has a Story" !

My Hors are a Moanin

Ok we have my friend Kim from Georgia to thank for this one....I can't remember how it happened exactly, but we were either chatting via Facebook or talking on the phone....doesn't matter she can make me laugh hysterically. I was complaining to her about hot flashes and wanting to laugh one minute and cry the next and all things to do with what we women call the "Change". She then tells me when she shares these things with her girls they promptly tell her that "mom your hors are a moanin". I wanted to tell her no baby mine aren't a moanin, they are a screamin. The doctor has given me drugs, but my husband is saying "up the doseage". Sorry honey. Thank God for a man that can put up with an ever changing woman and thank God for girl friends with whom you can discuss anything.....


From Kathie Lee Giffords book " Just When I Thought I'd Dropped My Last Egg"

IF I PRAYED as much I pluck, I'd be the Dalai Lama.
    If I were running for public office, I would run on an anti-flatulence platform.
    If I had a nickel for every cork I've popped, I'd own the Betty Ford Center.
    So, I guess when you put it all together,
    I'd be the hariless and holy wine-soaked
owner of the fart-free Betty Ford Center.
    But, I wonder, Would I be happy?
     OOOOH, YEAH.

Memories

I am sitting at a desk on a Monday afternoon and thoughts of RC Cola, Moon Pies and Strawberry Ice Cream came flooding through my mind. A reason for this could be that I have an RC Cola sitting on the desk. I am also thinking of my grandparents today. Notice Bilbo and Zelma Chain, two people that could have been characters in a cartoon. I think back about being a child and spending time with them at their home in Mississippi. My grandpa and grandma both loved RC Cola, so always had plenty of that to drink on a hot summer day and then grandma (us kids called her granny) liked to put her RC over strawberry ice cream. Doesn't sound like much till you try it...Yummy! Now Grandpa (us kids called him paw-paw) liked his RC Cola and moon pies, another yummy treat. I remember us going to town and getting groceries and paw-paw making sure we had plenty of moon pies and RC Cola in the cart and granny would grab the strawberry ice cream. Eat all of your supper and what a treat before bedtime. Great memories!

The Throne has not been abdicated!

I checked today and yes folks God is still on his Throne. The creator of the universe has not abdicated his seat. The reason I bring this up is what I have seen and am seeing in the Christian community. The belief that we have all the answers. Hey guys we really don't. OK let's get specific, yes we have the Bible and it is our guide book and if we read it we can avoid alot of heartache in our lives. If we share what it says with others, we can help them avoid the pitfalls in life as well.

That is not necessarily what I am referring to. What I am speaking to is our ability to come off as know-it-alls. We tend to think that because we have asked Father God to forgive us of our sins and to be Lord of our lives, and that if we read the Bible, that we have all the answers. The picture I keep getting in my head is of a human with a Bible under their arm and their nose stuck up in the air. I believe we can read the Bible all day long, every version and every language, but we still would not have all the answers. There is only one who does. The Creator of the Universe...Abba, Father God. I believe He has not or will not give us all of the answers....Why? Because we can not handle them. I personally am so glad I do not have to be responsible for the world and the answers to all of its problems.

I personally believe that when we as Christians; are presenting ourselves to the rest of the world, we should show humility, not haughtiness. To quote the Bible, "Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall" Prov. 16:18 NIV. Show love, mercy, kindness and have an humble spirit and it will have people asking all kinds of questions. Let us leave the problem solving to God, and let us allow the Holy Spirit to draw people to the Father. Father God is still alive today, still sitting on His Throne and is still speaking and drawing people to Him. There is nothing to big for God and nothing He cannot handle. Hey guys there is such freedom in letting go and letting God. Do your part and then let our Father handle it!

Forgiveness

When I started this blog on the evening of January 1st, I thought it would be on one subject. Then I began talking with my husband and realized that something else was on my mind. Let me start from the beginning...I was on a visit with family and listened to different ones talking about different people. I heard so much judgement coming from the conversations....I even caught myself getting caught up in it....I hate it when they judge me and I am the topic of conversation, but it was easy to talk about others. When I realized what was going on, I became angry at these people; angry at myself.

I was getting ready for bed that evening and began a conversation with my husband. I shared with him how angry I was at all the judgement that had happened during those family conversations and that how I felt so judged by family....It was then God began revealing, though yes judgement on others is wrong and it breaks his heart, there was something else going on in my heart and something he wanted to me to address.

As I got into bed and turned on my computer, I began looking up music on you tube. The music of Susan Ashton was on my mind and there were a couple of songs of hers that stood out about judgement, but there was one that I came across and it would not leave me alone and it wasn't about judgement at all, It was about FORGIVENESS. OUCH!!!! That voice in my head was saying pay attention this is what is really eating at you.... TEARS, TEARS, and more TEARS.

I began talking to God....The conversation went something like this.... (Donna) God, I know you want me to forgive and I do want to, but the hurt is so real. How do I just let it go? (God) Donna, do you love me? (Donna) Yes Father I love you with all of my heart.... (God) Then TRUST ME! Lay all of the hurt, anger, disappointment at my feet and JUST TRUST! It will all be taken care of....TRUST!

Now it is January 16th and I am finally finishing this blog. Have I learned anymore about forgiveness...um probably not....I just know in order to get forgiveness, I must give it. I also know that when you choose to forgive, you are not letting those that hurt you off the hook, but you are giving yourself permission to move on with your life. You are cutting those ties that bind you, loose. In my case I felt as if God handed me a large pair of scissors and said the rest is up to you kid. You can stay bound or you can go free. Today I choose freedom and it feels good!